RE: My visit to the Monastery

Hola Ro,

Don't worry about yesterday. There will be other readings. It's not important.

The monastery was good, it relaxed me, although, I didn't sleep well, so I was tired. I am having some stomach problems. It hurts, and I can't sleep.

I think it's worth the trip, but I don't think I could do it too often, not alone. It's a long drive, especially when you are falling sleep. It is in Escondido, kind of hidden in the mountains. I loved the frugality of it all, the simplicity and wilderness and lack of artificiality. No hyper-watered plump lawns. No fancy flowers in fancy pots. No. Just nature, dry grass, and whatever grows in an empty hill.

They are part of a Vietnamese order, the one you told me about. But the monks and nuns are not all Vietnamese. The one that gave us a talk was a white boy from Australia. There were a lot people, many of them Vietnamese, but not all, also families with kids. They even fed us, for free! Or a donation... Good vegetarian food. The funniest thing for me was the bells. Every so often, a bell will sound, coming from one of the gazebos spread like bell towers around the main hall, the meditation hall. They have a cowbell kind of sound, but bigger, deeper. I sat next to one of them, in one of the gazebos, and they are huge, decorated with images of dragons and Chinese letters. At the bottom, engraved in the metal, I saw a lion next to a swastika symbol, and then I remembered what I read once about it: the swastika, which is a word that comes from Sanskrit, was used by Hindus and Buddhist, well before the Nazis, as a mark of good luck.

Anyway, when the bell chimes, everybody, no matter where they are or what they are doing, stops and freezes in action, holding their attention towards the sound. They pause in an attentive way, like in meditation. When the sound fades, things go back to normal. I imagine someone from out of space arriving exactly at that moment when everybody freezes, when everything falls silent, except for the bell; I imagine that it might look weird seen from the outside: a bunch of people, some of them wearing brown robes, standing randomly spread across the campus, inside the buildings, just frozen on that attitude of quiet concentration. Nice photo.

Then, from there to read. It was a rich, full day. It helped me to see that we are not all the same, that I am good at things that others aren't, and vice versa, and that I don't have to be perfect at everything, I don't have to be a saint. Anyway, yes, more music and writing.

Are you anxious, are you ok? How do you hold on there? I would feel crazy if I was in your shoes. I get so anxious and stressed out for nothing! That's why the stomach pain, I think. Anyway, take care of yourself, breathe, as the monks say. On my way there I got lost. The directions where wrong, so I asked two people I saw on the way for directions, a Sunday at 9am not that many out there, but their directions got me nowhere. The first one because he didn't speak English, and the second one, because he didn't really know how to get there, until finally I thought, 'oh! I should call the Monastery!' So I called 411 and they connected me to the answering machine with a message with directions. At the end of the message they said: "If you get lost, don't panic. Just breathe... and smile." 



Besos

cuca